I've heard many say with unshakable conviction that their friends are their lives. But I shall beg to differ, and openly proclaim that friends are for free. I use a vernacular punch line to signify that as important as one might consider friends to be, they ultimately turn out to be insignificant. Jump not to conclusions or opinions as of now but just give this humble heart a chance to express what lies in it.

I beg you to not assume that I consider friends unneeded. They so much are needed! To share one's moments, to have a sense of belonging, to enjoy little joys, to et cetera et cetera; they serve a million purposes. I cannot disagree to that. Only that my contention is that friends are like currency notes and not like money. They are so much needed, and they need me (assuming that I'm the centre of the universe), but how long can one hang on to the same note? You need them but you also need to not need them one day.

We befriend people at work and play. We all have pals and best-friends. We become intimate and personal with people, speak to them as our own. We get them close to ourselves, just to leave them one day. When friends have distances to bear, their friendships behaves in the same way. Which should be observable from common experience. The place a certain personality held in your heart some time ago, has been replaced. I have friends without whom I felt fractional at one moment and now I don't even know, they might be living in Antarctica. People get bored, people get too used to to the same people. Meeting new people is always fun. What does this all suggest? Well.

I have no mind to undermine the close relationships (or superficial ones too for that matter) people possess, but I just intend to say that they are as temporary as a fly sitting on your arm. Bad analogy, I know. It's just because my next post is going to be about flies and other stuff.

Relatives already exist for us but friends are the ones we choose. We hear this all the time. But when desires clash, when interests intersect, when egos, and when material gains gain higher priority, then the connection is weakened. Friends keep coming and going, that too very easily. And I'm sure there'll be one day you'll think not so grandly of your best friend as you do today.

"Little known, better liked"

That is perhaps the reasons all friendships grow. The more one gets to know a person, more the vices that are discovered from behind the veil of the smiling sweet face. Disappointment rises and with a pinch, the goodness factor of the relation goes down.

We bind ourselves to others only for ourselves with a completely selfish view in mind. We continue that binding until it gives us joy, or assistance, or pleasure or satisfies some need or desire or whim. As soon as that is fulfilled, the other person is as important as a fly on the arm. Once we start to not get what we expect of the relation, we tend to terminate it. That's the whole, the simple and the plain truth.

Unfortunately, one cannot do without friends, but when friendships rise, so do expectations. The wise say that there are three things a person must have to be termed a fool. First, useless actions; Second, useless speech and finally useless expectations. In a nutshell, it is a sin to expect. For if the by fulfilling your expectation the other one must suffer pain (on a overall calculated basis, done subconsciously) you're going to suffer.

Being mercilessly honest, we're all part of the herd too. I myself suffer from the flaws I impute on others. I make friends for my benefit, for the purposes mentioned earlier. I stay loyal becuase I expect the other one to stay loyal. But since I am the centre of my universe, it's perfectly fine to look down on everybody and assume for some time that I am perfect. I too am a temporary person for other, my friends too will get bored of me and people will forget me too. But the best part is, I forgive them for being so and I forgive them even if they're not able to forgive me. Relations will break and rise, and the best part is that I'm perfectly fine with it because life will go on until one day ofcourse... :D

I do not write this because I have been betrayed by some friend in the recent past (or will be in the recent future). I do not write it because it is time to leave behind friends, family and home. Nothing substantial has happened to trigger this post. It has always been with me. So don't worry "friends" :)

But life is not all that dark. The ray of hope comes from the fact that friendship is not a rarity after all. Speak few kind words to someone and wallah! The other one likes you. That's another friend for you. Spend on currency note, work more and earn more notes. That's the principle of life. One shall always need some money but the notes are to be done with at some point of time.

This may make me sound like a criminal of the 4th degree but here it goes. Go on, break friendships, form new ones just to break or forget them one day. Love your friends but keep in mind that everybody is as evanescent you are, or I am for that matter. Be ready that they're not going to need you one day and you will not need them perhaps. Time has to power to make you forget anything. Life is fair.

You wouldn't know how it feels to be seventy-and-two, alone, disowned and blind. But Shanti Devi did. Shanti Devi - which meant the goddess of peace - how ironical could things be. Shanti Devi was considered no more than a blind pack of bones by her sons who had asked her to leave 'their' house. She served no purpose and just took up space in the house. She kept crashing everywhere, made irritating noises with her walking stick most of the the time, and spoke no better than babble. Her sons thought her fit to be homeless.

The destitute lady moved slowly with her walking stick unaware of her surroundings. Her eyes had left her long ago and now everyone she had had too.... or maybe she never had them. She had no purpose, no destination. Knowing not where to go, she kept walking slowly, thinking death was her only home, wishing that it devour her as soon as possible. So she kept walking and walking and walking and waited for death.

The world was full of noise, of people shouting, of sirens, of cars, of chats and cries but what was the purpose. People jostled her here and there, someone pushed her, someone stopped her but she kept going steady, apathetic. Death is the ultimate end. Death is the final outcome. Nothing could penetrate her ears now. She had to just keep walking. An uproar happened and a horn blared loudly but did she care? Did she care that on the busy day hundreds of people were restrained by the policemen who waited to go to their desinations? Did she care that she was in the middle of a road which had been cleared for the President's cavalcade which traveled at almost double the speed of normal traffic? Did she care that the first car of the cavalcade was about to crash into her? Perhaps not. But Bhanu Prasad cared. His valor pushed him forward, out of the crowd to be held by the hand by a policeman. He pushed the policeman and ran forward towards the old lady as fast as he possibly could. He pushed her aside just before the braking limo hit him at speed of light. Bhanu Prasad died there and then.

Shanti Devi's emaciated body got a push so hard, she flew and landed onto the footpath and rolled over to the next street on the downsloped road. The policeman Bhanu Prasad had pushed lost his balance, tripped and fell head first into an open manhole. The car in the procession braked so hard, it toppled over, took a few and crashed into the public which had been stopped by the policemen. The rest of the cars crashed into first car and the whole cavalcade was obliterated by an explosion which resulted from the combustion of the leaking fuel from one of the cars. All of the people, including the president died from the explosion. The people who were left alive to witness the explosion ran with all their might, resulting in a stampede and killing many more. Yasaf ali, a suicide bomber whose mission was to kill the president thought he would now have to save his life for another heaven-worthy task. But he was also killed in the stampede and the burdensome weight of people's legs could not be endured by the bomb.

In a matter of 20 seconds, all that was left was Shanti Devi - bleeding from the head, unaware of what happened, in agony and now in pain. But did she care? Perhaps not. She began to walk again and and started to wait again.

This is a selfish post. But I'm sure what applies to me, applies to all.

Three days is what it takes.

The bad thing about memory is that it is short term but the good thing about memory is that it is short term. And this bodes well. My four-year ten-year (tenure) at Eye Eye Tea is about to end and that manifest itself in sudden change from Yo Insti! to No Insti.

There is the good part of it. No more friends trying break one's privacy apart, no more boring lectures from Indian profs. No more useless presentations and hopefully no more fraud. But then since every coin has two faces (yes coins are a proper subset of monsters) the bad part will be, no friends, no lectures, no worthless presentations and no more fraud. No wait, there's more. No more WindT and no more lunching around and no more idle time wasted in hostels and no more many things.

But then the bad part too has a good part and a bad part. So the bad bad part is, it pains, all of it. It hurts because one is so used to all this that such a big change is as tough as giving birth to a cow. But then the good bad part is that the pain lasts only three days.

As a result of innumerable deep and brain-wrecking scientific and social experiments, I have come to the conclusion that within a span of 72 earthly hours, the magnitude of such pain reduces to such a small extent, it is barely noticed (which means I notice it only when I'm having a bath). In a nutshell, I forget stuff in three days. All associations, dissociations, medications etc etc are out of my mind by this time. Which is incredibly nice to hear.

Earlier I had plans getting into arguments and clashes with all my friends, so that I may hate them and separate more easily. But how could I fight with the physical location which I am so fond of? And how do I eradicate all memories that rest in my head. Fighting will help me rid of only people. But that, perhaps, does not seem necessary right now. All I'll prepare myself is for those three days of agony - which is, to practically speak, nothing. Therefore, I shall depart in all peace and calmness with a smiling face. For I shall know that after three days I shalln't miss a thing!

As for location, I will certainly find an equally beautiful location at the place I go. And as for people, let me quote one of my wise friends.
"Ache log to har jagah hee hote hai yar" (There's good people everywhere my friend).
I will forget them, they will forget me, eventually. And I will find new friends to forget them one day too. And then there are some things I love, which will certainly stay with me such as iPod, jeans, guitar and myself. Which too can be renewed upon requirement.

Make and break - The stern rule of nature which binds everyone. Sounds depressing but it feels good to know that all pleasure and pain must end one day. But let me leave the pondering for later and rejoice because..

Three days is what it takes.

ABC of me

for the anda
- Age: Jaise ladkiyo se nahi puchhte unki wages,
Ladko se bhi na poocho, ai zaalim, unki ages...
- Animal: Only if I was 10 feet taller, I'd bloody resemble a giraffe. Ummm you could say I'm a short giraffe!
- Anger: Only when someone takes my hanger! Na na, Just kiddin'. You don't even need to do that.
- Alcohol: Methanol, Ethanol, Propanol etc etc! Dekha I know it alls!

for the banda
-Birthday: I don't believe in birthdays!
-Believe in yourself?: Naaa!! I'm just a myth!
-Been in love: I thought only humans 'fell' in love. Never knew beans suffered the same disorder.
-Best weather: Arre this damn weather. Ok, a poem for weather on this very note. (Not the currency wala note you greedy pig)

Whether oh weather,
Whether you weather,
My love for you O weather,
Like shoes of hard leather,
Shall never ever weather.

-Believe in miracles: Toone meri beliefs ka thheka le rakha hai be.

-Believe in God: Only.

-Believe in Santa: Nopes. I think banta's the better guy.

for samundra
- Colour: Bloody racist! Hum bharateey hain. No color caste creed sex etc matters.! Oops.. maybe sex does (Dirty mind)..

- Chocolate/Vanilla: Vanilla khaayein mere dushman! Woh to sasti hoti hai!

- Coffee: Bas ab caaffee ho gayi. Summer's here dudes!

- Chinese/Italian: None! What do you take me for? A Cannibal!

- Cake or pie: Dude! Comparing cake and pie is like .. like.. comparing pie and cake man! I mean there's no comparison. Don't ask ze foolish questions.

- Cooking: Do I look like a pressure cooker. Well, I've been wondering. If a cook cooks food, what does a pressure cooker cook? Pressure? Hey wait wait wait.. Do you mean there's a pressure cooker inside our stomachs!?

for danda
- Day or Night: As far as I think both exist. Where is the point of conflict ?

- Danced: Apahij

- Dance in the rain?: Oh my gawd! My delicate clothes shall get wet! Don't dare think on such preposterous lines.

- Drugs: Love em! But couldn't ever have um. It all started when I went to a drug store once and I found only medicines! In my mind I thought 'Weird' and then I said 'Weird'.

for imli
- Everyone has a: desire for mani.. Oops I mean money!

- Eyes: None. I'm deaf, dumb and blind. This is a braille keyboard. Hello braille keyboard.

for funda
- Full name: Konse full ka naam batau? Gulab? Chameli? Champa? Sab pata hai mujhe, sab aata hai.

- First crush: Kala Khatta! Juhu beach.

- First thoughts waking up: What is the purpose of this life? Who am I? What am I for? What is this 'I'? How did I come into existance? Is all this real? Why am I thinking all this? How shall I answer these questions? Is this the right question? Do I like asking questions?

for ganda
- Greatest Fear: Fear

- Greatest Strenght: Chapaaaaat padega to samajh ayega

for hottori honzo! (ref: Kill Bill)
- Hair Colour: Depends. Which hair.

- Hate: to Hate.

for india
- Interests: Loan dene ke interest charge karta hu. Only 2.5% pa. Click here to apply now.

- Insanity: Perfect insan. Madad karna, ache karam karna, daan dena, vidya lena, pooja karna, satya uchaarna. Aur kya karega insan.

- Impulsive: NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

for jhanda

- Job: Jobless.

for kaanda (pyaaz)

- Kids: 31.19 (All secret)

for ladaku vimaan
- Letter: Letter pe sher arz kiya hai...
Jinke dil mil jaate hain weh khat nahi likhte,
Jinke dil mil jaate hain weh khat nahi likhte,
Ab to e-mail ka zamana hai.

- Love:
To fall in love is in vain,
for he that falls into it fain,
shall roil away,
in dust and pain.

for manda (for example dhanda manda)
- Moron: Yeah. Abhi kam on hai. More on karo! Light bhi on karo. Fan bhi on karo. AC bhi on karo. Sab kuch on karo! Moron!

for nanda (mere dost naam)
- Naughty: In what sense? ;) Naughty!
- Number of Siblings: 998102832, 9919248134

for onda (bengali anda)
- One wish: To have no more wishes. Oops I mean nau more wishes!

for panda
- Place: Omnipresent.
- Princess: Dude! The word is princesses!
- Prince: Prince detergent tikia aur powder ka zabardast fan!
- Pizza: There are only 2 kinds of pizzas in the world. Cheese pizzas and the rest. Thank you.

for kyu?
- Questionnaires: Questionnaires?

- Reason to cry: Anything! But only khushi ke aasoon.
- Reason to smile: Anything! But only khushi ke aasoon.
- Reason to laugh: Anything! But only khushi ke aasoon.

- Shoe size: kyun? joote gift dega kya ? Nike Please! US 10
- Smoked?: Cant even touch yaar!
- Sing well?: Ubharta sitaara!
- Single: Jaan kya kare hai?
- Stuffed Animals?: exist only for people with stuffed brains

- TV: I dont watch them TV. Them TV watch me!
- Tatoo: for gadhe ke tattoos

Umbrella: Nopes. Umbrella karna paap hai.

Vanity: In vain.

Weakness: You're talking about weakness!!! I feel monthness!

X-factor: X-factor? Like X-PM or X-gf ? Kya? 3.424 ? Kya?

Y-factor: Abe yeh blog hai ya equation set?

Zodiac sign: Aquaaaaaa... *dead*

I turn around to grasp your neck,
to fill the air and strum you on,
to suffuse the mind with aural gleam,
And I turn around to find you gone.

I recall the days of splendid sounds,
the notes and tones and beats you spawn,
Then I feel that it was all a dream,
And I turn around to find you gone.

The pick is lonely, the mic dejected,
My throat, in memory, does only mourn,
I sing alone your sweet refrain,
And I turn around to find you gone.

The air is bland, my life is chilling,
all music, sans you, is traffic horn,
I miss your sonorous voice in pain,
And I turn around to find you gone.

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